Paleo Marine

From this week forward, I will be featuring articles by my amazing wife, Sherry! She has her own blog at ourdailybacon.com, but she and I feel that the real strength in our message and example for others is the combined message we share: I’m the tough love and she’s the soft side with the great recipes. Together, we make for a good team!

Her site will still be separate and she will continue to post there, but I will be reblogging her articles here which will make it show up as a blog entry on my site as well. This should be a helpful feature for those who read both of our blogs. There are so many times I wanted to post the same thing she posted, especially when it comes to foods and recipes. This solves that problem for me!

If you haven’t checked out her blog yet, you should do so! It’s really well written, and the recipes and insight she has is truly valuable. GO NOW!

This post starts rather innocently and ends with me in full Staff Sergeant mode. If your sensibilities are easily hurt, you may want to skip this article.

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My weight is around the average for people my age, or so I’m told. This is great! Or is it?

We know how averages work: Take all the values and add them together and then divide the sum by the number of values. The problem is that what we really should be looking at is the mode: the most commonly occurring number in the set. What is the mode average weight of people my age? I don’t have the answer, but it’s much higher than what I weigh. How do I know this? Because I’m now considered “thin” in comparison to most people my age, and I am most definitely not thin. I’m average, at best. Heck, by BMI standards, I’m still overweight.

I bring this up because it’s common and accepted for people to gain some weight as they age. It’s even biological for us to put some weight on in the midsection as we get older. What is not biological nor should be common and accepted is being obese. I don’t mean that it’s okay to shame people for it; that never is. However, being obese or fat is a condition that is within our power. Skin color, genetic conditions, and gender are examples of things we cannot easily change, but our weight is something within our power.

I have been told by a few people that their being overweight is caused by a thyroid condition. If that’s true, then we need to look into thyroid technology that can take 1000 calories and turn it into 5000 calories in the bodies of those people with this condition. I don’t doubt the condition: I doubt the honesty of these people in dealing with what they are putting into their bodies. This is not shaming: this is observation. Hyperthyroidism doesn’t make you eat Big Macs, Pizza Hut, or Taco Bell. Hyperthyroidism doesn’t take 1000 calories and bloat you. Eating too much bloats you.

If you’re not going to be honest with yourself, then you are wasting your time. I say that over and over again; so much, in fact, that I feel like a broken record. Stop wasting time. I don’t say that to inspire you to give up; I’m hoping for the exact opposite. We hate wasting time and effort. Make your effort count! Make the time you spend more efficacious. Find a diet that works for you, and STICK TO IT AS IF YOUR LIFE DEPENDS ON IT (because it does!).Losing weight is not hard. Beating cancer is hard. A combat veteran running a marathon with one leg is hard. An orphaned child in a third world country raising her brothers and sisters in poverty is hard. Losing weight is a first world problem. Stop lying to yourself and being weak and giving into cravings and eating like crap. You have no excuses, and nobody to blame for your being fat but yourself.

I have heard more than once, “I’m not so sure about eating Paleo. It seems like it’s not a very varied diet and that your health will suffer.” Well, if my health is suffering, it’s suffering in a weird way.

Most of these very same people who tell me my diet isn’t varied enough suffer from being overweight, having issues with staying awake, and having mobility issues. I ask them if their diets are healthy, to which they answer, “Yes, I just need to practice more moderation.” Once again: the moderation myth.

When it comes to the food I eat, I would rather take my chances with a diet that contains healthy foods and no added-sugar or foods that are high in carbs. With all the evidence mounting about how bad high-carb foods are, I would rather err on the side of caution and just avoid them. Besides, the “suffering” my health is doing is manifesting as normal blood sugar, normal cholesterol, normal weight, normal body-fat percentage, and improved mobility and strength.

If that’s what Paleo is, I will suffer for it.

At least once a day, I hear someone say to me, “I could never do what you’re doing.” Sherry and I talked about this last night as I was recounting my experience earlier in the day with someone asking me how I lost my weight and once I told them, they said they couldn’t do that. Sherry smiled and said, “Well, nobody can do anything. Until they can.”

It sounds simplistic and silly, but it’s true. I used to say I couldn’t give up carbs. Until I could. I reached a point where the decision was a simple one. It’s that tipping point from, “I can’t do this” to “I have to do this” or “I will do this.”

I can’t push you to make the decision to eat healthy or to do what it takes to eat right and lose weight. Only you can do that yourself. You have to find your motivation, whatever it may be. Once you do, I can encourage you, congratulate you, and push you to keep going, but I can’t get you there. That’s all on you.

If you’re not willing to go 100% toward this goal, you are wasting your time. I say that not to someone who is trying and occasionally slips and cheats, but to those who give lip service to eating right yet continually make exceptions and don’t stick to the plan and then wonder why they aren’t seeing the results I have experienced.

There are things I could never do. I could never go anything less than 100% on this lifestyle. I could never go back to eating pre-processed, added-sugar foods. I could never give up and eat the way I used to. I could never go back to how I used to be: fat, out of shape, and always in pain.

I want to sing like James Brown. “I feel good!” HEY!

Sherry and I were sitting by the pool last night as I was smoking a new pipe with some new tobacco (very low in carbs… lol) and we were talking about the changes our bodies have undergone in the past year. Both of us commented about how much thinner our legs have gotten since losing all the weight. While our legs weren’t what I would call fat, they were very big and muscular. They had to be: they were carrying a lot of extra weight every day.

As we’ve lost weight, so have we lost muscle in our legs, most notably, our calves. They are noticeably smaller now. We also have much smaller thighs which allows us to sit with our legs crossed comfortably. I can sit with crossed legs in any chair now.

I also noticed that sitting outside last night by the pool, I wasn’t sweating nor did I even feel that hot. I felt comfortable; the amount of sweat my body was producing was enough to actually keep me cool and didn’t accumulate on me as it evaporated. In the past, I would sweat too much which would keep the heat trapped inside and would make me sweat even more profusely. What a difference!

These changes have happened to Sherry and I within a year, which makes it feel very fast to us. In our heads, we are still the fat people we were a year ago. Seeing ourselves in the mirror is still strange, and feeling small within our “New” bodies is a strange experience. Notice, I didn’t say a bad experience: It’s freaking awesome!

We talked about how we no longer are tempted by high-carb or high-sugar foods anymore. While our ways of coping are different, my method involves realizing that the small moment of gratification is not worth the long-term satisfaction of being healthy and lighter (and thinner!). I just can’t justify eating foods that are unhealthy anymore unless at a celebration, holiday, or special event, and even then, in very small amounts.

I don’t ever want to feel the way I used to. Not ever again. I felt tired, worn out, and sore all the time. I was embarrassed for my size and my inability to fit into booths at restaurants or to sit comfortably in airplanes. Now, my motivation is strengthened by my love of how I feel. Like I tell people all the time when they ask me if I miss pizza: “I love being thin more than I love pizza.” And I love pizza a lot.

I keep myself motivated by reminding myself any time I have even the slightest thought of eating something that isn’t on my good list that I’ve come a long way, it was hard work, and I don’t want to slide backward in my progress toward 165 lbs. I have been good so far, and haven’t had any moments of weakness, but I am not immune from the memories of chocolate cake, cookies, and pizza.

When the thought comes to me, I’ve employed a little trick that seems to work well for me: I remember the flavor, I remember how I enjoyed it, and then I put it out of my mind. Just like that. It’s no Jedi Mind Trick, but it works for me.

I am recovering from a food addiction. I used to eat for the pleasure of eating. I used to eat because it was entertainment. I used to eat because I was addicted to it. Now, I’ve got it under control by eating three times a day and eating standard portions. I am very strict about it, and I don’t allow myself any leeway.

I am doing this for me, first and foremost. I am selfish, and I want to enjoy grandchildren one day. I want to enjoy dancing with my wife. I want to enjoy annoying her for many years to come. Of course, I am doing this for my wife and kids, too, but the person I least want to let down is myself. I’ve put too much energy into this to let it go to waste.

I feel so good now, I never want to go back to how I felt before. Not just physically, but emotionally. I stay the course because all other options lead to failure, and failure is not an option. I will adapt, improvise, and overcome. You can do this, too. Just commit to it.

Forget what I’m doing. Forget what anyone else is doing. We want to concentrate on what you’re doing in terms of nutrition. Are you eating right? Can you name every ingredient in the foods that you’re eating? What about the drinks? If there are words you can’t pronounce in the foods you’re eating or drinking, then chances are you’re not eating right.

A good, simple rule that Sherry and I follow is that if we know what all the ingredients are (and we can pronounce them!), it’s probably good food. Most pre-processed foods have not only a lot of added sugar or fillers made from grains in them, but also a lot of chemicals. Some of these are used as preservatives while others are used for flavoring. Many of these chemicals are not the kind of stuff you want in your body. At least I don’t. But again, this isn’t about me.

Are you eating foods that are natural? Are the foods you eat prepared by you or someone in your home? Does this food fill you up and allow you to make it to  your next meal without cravings in between meals?

Do you avoid high-carb foods? Do you avoid pre-processed foods? Do you avoid foods with added sugar?

If the answer to these questions are, “No,” then you really should take a look at what you eat and your health. In this post, I’m not telling you what to do. I’m recommending you look at what you are already doing and analyze how much of your current health is related to the foods you eat. Overweight? Food. Non-Alcoholic Fatty Liver Disease? Food. Type 2 Diabetes? Possibly food. High cholesterol? Food (and not the foods you think!).

Take the time to be honest with yourself and perhaps make a food log for a day or three. Take a look at what you’re eating and look up the ingredients list for them. Look up the nutritional information for these foods. Then, for a next step, investigate lifestyle changes that can improve your health and help you lose weight.

Remember the 80’s? Back before the Internet, when people shared information, it was likely done in the form of a mimeograph or what we used to call “Xerox copies.” I remember my mother bringing home one of these mimeographs of something called The Cabbage Soup Diet that was supposedly developed by a cardiologist who swore that this soup was the cure to heart disease and obesity. The recipe was pretty simple and full of vegetables, and as soups go, pretty healthy. The mimeograph stated that one could eat as much of this soup as they wanted, but just this soup. The problem is that this is a very bland soup and after eating it for two or three meals, you get bored.

Thankfully, in the Internet age, we have access to lots of ideas, opinions, and information so that we can make our own decisions based upon all the information posted online. This also allows for discussion around what works, what doesn’t, and most importantly, why. The Cabbage Soup Diet is a deprivation diet: it cuts out a lot of food groups and restricts food groups dramatically.

I overheard two co-workers talking this morning, and one was advocating this very same soup. I know that this “Diet” is still out there, as my own mother-in-law is an adherent. When they co-workers saw me approach, one of them asked me, “What do you think about the Cabbage Soup Diet?” I told them that I personally couldn’t do it because I need variety and a more varied diet. I need to be able to have meats, vegetables, fruits, and in various forms. Its the variety that allows me to stick with eating good, whole foods and keeps me from wanting to quit the Paleo lifestyle. This is very important to Sherry and I; we have to have delicious foods.

I am not a fan of diets that are restrictive or bland. Some people may try to claim that Paleo is restrictive, but in actuality, it’s not. I eat meat, vegetables, fruit, and even some dairy from time to time. I have eggs daily. All the nutrients a human needs comes from the foods I eat. What I have cut out of my diet is high-carb foods: grains, beans, and anything with added sugar and most dairy.

Whatever you do, make sure it’s something that is healthy for you and that you can stick with. Changing your diet temporarily is never going to work for the long term. Moderation is not something people with eating issues can do successfully (ask me how I know). The only real way to make a permanent change is to make a lifestyle change. Nobody likes hearing it, but it’s the truth. The good news is that it’s not as bad as people make it out to be.

My grandmother used to have a saying: We should eat to live, not live to eat. When she would tell me this, I thought I understood what she was saying, but it seemed a little unrealistic to me. I was a person who not only loved food, I lived it. I would finish one meal and begin planning for the next. I would eat not due to stress, but because the act of eating was something I loved. I was the epitome of “Live to eat.”

Almost a year ago, I took the first steps to reversing that toxic lifestyle and changed my relationship with food. I went from being a person who lived to eat to being a person who eats to live. The change was monumental.

In the beginning, it was tough. I was one of those people who used to say, “I could never give up bread, pasta, beans, or rice.” I had to learn quickly that those foods were out of my lifestyle. But more than that, I had to realize that I was eating three meals a day to fuel my body and for no other purpose. That didn’t mean that my food had to taste horrible or bland. It just meant that I would eat only the amount of food needed to fuel my body, and only foods that were good for my body. Nothing more.

This was tough. It took as much mental discipline as it took me to get through USMC boot camp. However, something strange happened: I was able to adapt to it rather quickly.

I found that I was no longer hungry between meals. I felt sated and energized after meals instead of feeling sluggish and tired. I could do things during the day without thinking about what my next meal would be, not because I was hungry, but because I used to look forward to the next meal as a way to entertain myself.

As I drove home last night, I thought about the fact that my days are now filled with so much more than a preoccupation with food. My mind isn’t beholden to the food I eat, nor is it constantly thinking about food. When it’s meal time, I look forward to eating and I enjoy delicious foods, but it’s not the center of my universe anymore.

Like a toxic interpersonal relationship with someone, a toxic relationship with food can make life miserable. The best course of action when you’re in a bad relationship is to cut them out of your life. I had that sort of relationship with high-carb foods and sugar. It was hurting me on a regular basis, and eventually was going to kill me. I was able to change my relationship with food by engaging good foods instead of those that were out to kill me, and now, my life couldn’t be happier.